Ole is gone this week.

:(

My 'substitute dad' AKA 'the person who was going to give me at least a couple hours of sleep' AKA 'my sister' got sick of us after one night.

Or, to tell the truth, she really just got sick. Poor Krista.

So it's just me and the kiddos.

Aaaaaand naptime just ended. Got to go.

Two Under One: Diapers

Seriously, diapers.

Diapers.

Diapers. ALL. DAY. LONG.

And if you can come in my house and NOT find a dirty diaper hanging out somewhere (the kitchen table, an end table…the floor..), well…then I deserve mad props.

[In the most optimistic part of my dreamland, I imagine that they will both be potty trained at the same time. That’s not too much to ask, is it?]

Two Under One: Announcing #2

I was twelve weeks pregnant with Stella when Gideon was born.

I realize that this is not how most people start their family, but it was the perfect way to start ours.  [Um, I have to say that, because there's no changing how things went down. But really, it's exactly what was supposed to happen for us!]

I think for the entire second trimester, strangers just assumed I had leftover baby fat. Fine. And for the third trimester...I don't know. Either I had a LOT of leftover baby fat, or that kid in the stroller wasn't mine? I wasn't too worried about what strangers thought.

But I really, really dreaded telling friends and acquaintances that I was pregnant.

People in general get way more excited when you tell them that you are pregnant as opposed to when you tell them that you are adopting. People [again, in general] don't really know how to respond to adoption. They're hesitant to get too excited because the process can be so unstable. They're not sure if it's what we really wanted [IT WAS], or if it was just a last resort...like, we're just desperate to have a child and we’ll do anything. It’s not so much that people are rude…it’s just that they’re pretty uneducated when it comes to adoption. 

I suppose, in light of that paragraph, I need to quickly tell you our reasons for adopting [if you don’t already know]. We felt called to adoption from the beginning of our marriage. When we decided we wanted kids, we tried biologically and had two miscarriages. By far the worst two experiences of my life, but statistically our odds were still good to get pregnant & have healthy kids that way. We knew, instead, that we were being called to actively pursue adoption.  Okay that's the quick version. 

Back to telling people I was pregnant... Of course I wanted the baby [who I now know is my darling Stella], but when I got pregnant all I could think about was:
1). I cannot deal with another miscarriage
and
2). This could destroy our adoption plan.  I could lose a child that I was already becoming attached to. [We were completely blessed with the fact that neither of these worries actually became reality. Completely blessed.]

 So. Announcing. We waited until after we came home with Gideon before telling the world that I was pregnant. And people got extra happy for us. Ugh. Like, 'yay, you're finally getting what you really wanted!' I would cringe at these comments. I heard everything from "I suppose you could have backed out of the adoption?" to [my very, very least favorite] "You went through all of that just to get pregnant!" 

Of course people meant well. But that was a rough time for me.

And of course it turned out great. One of my biggest fears is that people will think I didn’t want things to work out the way they did…that I didn’t want one child or the other. The fact of the matter is, I am unbelievably blessed with these two babes. I am thrilled that events took place the way they did. Looking back, I realize that the timing of e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g. was completely perfect.

It’s almost as if some great cosmic being had his hand in this. Oh. Wait.

He did. 

Looking at this past year, I can see God’s fingerprints covering every little detail. Our family is blessed to have such an amazing story to share!

Two Under One: The Miniseries

Yesterday I came across an article in a parenting magazine about 'Two Under Two'--parenting two children under the age of two.  

Pphsh, I thought, try two under one.
[okay, I admit--two under two would be tough, too. so props to those parents as well.]

And so, I've decided to do a series of posts about life with two kiddos under the age of one. Some of these are probably insights that any mother will have. Some are going to be very unique to our situation. It may not be interesting but I feel like I'll have something to say now, rather than Ole just putting up poor quality iPhone pictures in attempt satiate the grandparents' update appetite.

So, if you see a post not-so-cleverly titled "Two Under One" [title suggestions welcome...especially since this title will only work for four more months], you know what's coming. Read it. Or not. Whatever. 

K

Another mealtime

Isn't he great?

Photo by my SIL Caristy (thanks!).

Life lately has been nothing but babies. Everything revolves around feedings, naptimes, bathtimes, bedtimes.  Ole and I talk about what we find in diapers and debate what sort of schedule will help our kids thrive.

Sometimes it's all quite overwhelming. It's hard to imagine when our next date night will be or if I'll ever spend time with my girlfriends again.

But I am a mom, and I love it.

Gideon amazes me. His smile alone melts my heart, and don't even get me started on his eyes. Adorable, period. He's this close to crawling; he pivots around in circles like a pro and often gets up on all fours. I'm torn between my excitement for his new phase and sheer panic at the thought of having to chase after him.

Stella is our little cupcake. I simply cannot believe that she's a month old. I'm pretty sure I coaxed a smile out of her yesterday. I'm disappointed to tell you that she's losing the hair on the top of her head. I think she'll look like a tiny old man pretty soon, but she's definitely all girl. I think she's kind of a diva. The cute kind. I'm excited to get to know her better in the coming months.


K

4

2

Trying to figure out how to carry both my kids at the same time...it's like carrying a sack of [very wiggly] potatoes and a teapot full of tea at the same time. Any hints?

K

3

Scenes from a reunion, part 1

By request

Here is Stella's face.

Fail.

Roadtrip

Hanging out

Fargo, day 1

Don't worry, Stella is with us too.

He had extricated himself and was in a completely different position by the next time I was in the room.